What is Emoational Regulation?
Psychology and therapy circles use the term “emotional regulation” a lot. But what does it mean?
This post discusses this concept in more detail, including its formal definition and strategies for dealing with out-of-control emotions.
Definition
Emotional regulation is the ability to react healthily to one’s emotions. It doesn’t mean never experiencing any disruption to your feelings. However, it does include an ability to moderate negative emotions so you don’t harm yourself because of them.
Emotional regulation is essential in the context of individuals suffering from addiction and recovery. The people who can deal with unwanted feelings the best are often those who succeed long-term.
Researchers believe that the problem isn’t the emotion itself (for most people) but the interpretation of it. Emotions are, at base, feelings, meaning they don’t contain cognitive content. Rather, the narratives surrounding them do, and these can be dangerous.
For example, if you feel shame, you might experience a physiological reaction (such as blushing). However, constructing a narrative around it, such as “I am a loser and everyone knows it” or “Nobody will ever respect me again after this,” can worsen the emotional response.
Useful Skills for Adults
With this definition in mind, you can develop useful skills to prevent negative emotions from running out of control. The trick here is to recognize the story you create.
The first step is to see the situation for what it is (i.e. the circumstances that caused the unwanted emotion). Often there is a trigger, such as family members’ criticism or the stress involved in driving on busy roads.
The next step is to identify the thoughts following the initial trigger such as “My parents don’t think I’m good enough” or “The world always wants me to be late for work.” Stepping in at this point can help regulate your emotions more effectively. The alternative is to revert to your default reaction (i.e. self-criticism, rumination, self-harm, or substance abuse).
Science-Based Emotional Regulation Strategies
Researchers know of numerous science-based emotional regulation strategies that are healthy and avoid harm.
For example, you could:
- Take a break when you need it. Stopping work or ending an unhelpful conversation can prevent or reduce triggering.
- Get more sleep. Increasing shut-eye duration helps you feel rested and more prepared to tackle the day’s challenges.
- Take care of yourself when you are ill. A tendency toward “presenteeism” or the idea you always need to be in the office can make it harder to regulate emotions. Therefore, taking time off when necessary is essential.
- Exercise. Physical activity often replaces negative emotions with positive ones, helping you focus on the bright side of life.
- Write in a journal. Putting your thoughts down on paper can help some people expel them from the mind.
- Meditate. Concentrating on the breath or thoughts passing through your mind can make you feel more peaceful.
- Talk therapy. Counseling, cognitive behavioral therapy, and other approaches may also help.
Some research also shows that learning the skill of reappraisal can also work. The idea is to use your cognition to reframe an experience in a more positive or flattering light. Practitioners recommend generating a new narrative around what’s happened and responding to that instead.
Lastly, you can try practicing gratitude. Being thankful for your life circumstances helps generate positive emotions, even in challenging circumstances. It can also help you see the good in the bad, preventing feelings from running out of control and lowering your quality of life.
Examples of Emotional Self-Regulation
Here are some examples of triggers that can cause emotional dysregulation and how to respond to them:
Example 1: Work-related criticism
Being criticized at work can lead some people to question their ability to perform their jobs, causing feelings of shame, anger, and inadequacy. But, you can deal with this trigger by reframing the experience. For example, you could say managers aren’t saying anything about you as a person. Instead, they’re providing helpful feedback that can spur your career to new heights.
Example 2: Family arguments
Family arguments can also lead to emotional problems. The people closest to us often have the greatest ability to hurt us, leading to depression, shame, and despair.
Fortunately, you can manage these emotions by reappraising how you view your family. Instead of seeing them as the arbiters of happiness, you can view them as people facing challenges in their lives, causing them to act out.
Example 3: Feeling inadequate in life
Finally, feeling inadequate in life can also lead to emotional difficulties. You may not have a partner or a high-flying career but believe you should. You can deal with issues like these by exercising (which gives you a sense of agency) and practicing gratitude for what you have already.
Take The First Step: Reach Out To Peaks Recovery Centers
If you need help with emotional regulation or deal with negative feelings by using substances, talk to Peaks Recovery. We can help you overcome addictions and return your life to normal.
Contact us today at 855-608-1222 to begin your journey toward long-term recovery.
Medical Disclaimer: Peaks Recovery Centers uses fact-based content about recovery treatment, addiction medicine, and behavioral health conditions to improve the quality of life for those struggling with drug and alcohol addiction or mental health disorders. This information does not replace professional medical guidance, diagnosis, care, or treatment. This information should not be used as a substitute for advice from a qualified healthcare provider and/or physician.