
Episode 170
Who Takes Care of the Helpers? Fighting Mental Health Stigma with C.F.J.J.C
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Description
In this episode of Finding Peaks, Chris sits down with Tyler Moran, Jose Paz, and John Roy, co-founders of the Colorado Firefighter Jiu-Jitsu Club (C.F.J.J.C.), to talk about first responder mental health, breaking stigma, and the power of finding community through jiu-jitsu. Firefighters and other first responders carry the weight of experiences most people never see. From the lasting impact of COVID to the pressure of always being the person others can depend on, taking care of yourself can be difficult to prioritize. C.F.J.J.C. is creating a space where first responders can show up, check their egos at the door, put in the work, and find a community where they can feel seen, valued, and heard. Together, we explore the inspiration behind the club, why mental health matters, and how jiu-jitsu can be a tool for building resilience, regulating your mental space, and connecting with others who understand the challenges you face. We also talk about the importance of putting yourself first, doing the hard things, and recognizing that asking for support is part of taking care of yourself. Because the people who help others deserve a place where they can be helped, too.
Talking Points
- Introduction to the Show
- Meet Colorado Firefighter Jiu Jitsu Club(C.F.J.J.C)
- Mental health matters
- The inspiration for C.F.J.J.C
- Check your ego at the door
- Get ready to work
- Being seen, valued, and heard in community
- COVID’s impact on Firefighters
- The helping community
- Putting yourself first
- Doing the hard things
- Find C.F.J.J.C
- Closing thoughts
Quotes
“Some people are in jiu-jitsu, right, and they don’t know that they’re there for their own mental health. Like, we have recognized, or at least I have, I’m there for a purpose, man. Like, get rid of my demons, you know?”
Episode Transcripts
Some some people have like terrible days and and and then some people have like the worst days of their lives and you guys are a part of the worst days of people’s lives and and that’s like a Wednesday. This the society of the fire service we’re the problem solvers. So we just move from one thing to another and I think I’m the only one right now who’s removed from the fire service. Right? And I’ve spent enough time removed now that I realize like, okay, now that I’ve removed myself from that situation, here are some things that I reflect back on and I’m like, that really divided us. We we see things that most ordinary people are not going to see on a daily basis. And like you said, that’s just a regular Wednesday to us, right? Um, and it’s a constant thing that we see. Um, and at the end of the day, we know we signed up for, right? I think it takes a a certain individual to do the job that we do, right, for an extended period of time. Some people are in jiu-jitsu, right? And they don’t know that they’re there for their own mental health. Like, we have recognized, or at least I have, I think most of us have, like, I’m there for a purpose, man. Like, get rid of my demons, you know? I come home, like you said, a better person. um ready to like be dad go into dad mode, you know, after school or or whatever, right? Um some of those dudes don’t even know that that’s what they’re getting out of it, right?
Hey everybody and welcome to another finding episode, finding episode another amazing episode of Finding Peaks, our beautiful podcast. here today. It is a special special date for me to be here with some friends and now some colleagues. But I kind of wanted to open this thing up um first with introductions. Um I met these guys through jiu-jitsu um which has been a really powerful uh coping mechanism for me over the last three and a half years specifically over the last year and a half. Experienced a tremendous amount of intensity, grief, loss, life happens. And there was something about um being able to step on the mat and and kind of lead some of those problems on on on the other side. And then the person that returned to those problems was much better equipped to deal with it one day at a time. And I think that’s something that each and every one of you has fostered and informed not only um professionally but also in your communities. And so I’m grateful to have you guys on the show today. To my right, we have John Roy. He’s a co-founder of Tabular Raza Jiu-Jitsu here in Colorado Springs. He’s also an IBJJJF black belt. That’s right. That’s right. IBJ. I actually saw him um in his first Was it your first match? Yeah. First Yep. Yeah. You’re out there kind of cutting some weight a little bit. Yeah. First uh black belt match in Albuquerque. Yeah. Whoever the [ __ ] that. Yeah. He was like one of the top five ranked guys. So yeah, I was just happy to like I lost some points. You didn’t get didn’t get submitted. Didn’t get submitted round. Yeah. Wait for that. I had to cut weight because I was coming back from Costa Rica. So, I was like seven pounds over. I didn’t realize how much it was over. Yeah. I didn’t I Well, not when I got there, but I didn’t bring a scale with me to Costa Rica. So, I was like I was seven pounds over. Yeah. So, when I got back on Wednesday, dude, I I went to Tabs and I weighed myself on the doctor’s scale that we had and I was seven pounds over and I’m like, “Oh my gosh, dude. Am I going to be able to cut this?” Well, when you’re bigger, you can cut 10 lbs in a day if you’re dumb about it, which is that usually how I cut weight is dumb. So, I started not eating like 24 hours before. I was just, you know, crunching on ice. And then when I got there in the morning, I was still 2 lbs over. So, I ran for like an hour, hour and a half, and then I was still like 0.5 over. So, I just took my underwear off and Oh, yeah. I did the thing, dude. Yeah. It was like the last suggestion. Did you have that was Did you have plastics on when you were cutting? No, just like a hoodie. What is this? Your first time, bro? I tried to make it as hard as possible, dude. Yeah. So, I competed. You didn’t have underwear on. No, I tied for put it back on. I tied Yeah, I tied the pants as as tight as I could, dude. I tied the pants as tight as I could cuz I was like, if I’m going to be so embarrassed, dude. And my my daughter was with me. I I went I brought her with me to Albuquerque and I’m like, can you imagine, dude? I’m competing in front of my daughter and she’s all proud of me and then I just get freaking pants. His balls all sorts of confusion. Yeah, dude. So, I tied those pants tighter than I’ve ever tied D pants. Jesus, that’s solid, man. So, that’s John Roy. Yeah, that’s me. That was there in a nutshell, guys.
Yeah, man. Nope. Over here, we got Tyler Moran. Um, also a Mast’s World blue belt jiu-jitsu champion as well as purple belt IBJJF. Correct. Yeah. Love that. And then for before when you left here, you were a captain of the fire station up here at the Air Force Academy. Now you’re out in Kala California. Southern Southern California. Correct. Okay. Down in Cornonado. Coronado. What’s your position down there now? Captain as well. Let’s go, babe. Took a lateral transfer, man. Yeah. Yeah, it was easy. Um easy to leave us. I mean, it wasn’t easy to leave, but surprisingly it was easy to transfer it like in the DoD. Um you can go from like one base to another fairly easily. That’s cool. Um, sometimes with the officers spot it’s like a little more difficult, but you know, is what it is. We got the opportunity and kind of pulled the trigger. So, that’s dope, man. Looks like your family is thriving. Also, Tyler is like expert Air Force trainer, jump out of planes type [ ] Like teach you how to do it like in a violent way with the small shoots, like all the stuff, right? I was doing that this morning. I just came from there, man. Oh, yeah. It’s one of my favorite things to do at Peaks Recovery. Kubn knows. There’s Okay, I swear to God, dude. Like, you inspire people. I’m like, okay, check this out. So, I’m over there. There’s two chairs and they just look up at Pikes Peak in the Air Force Academy and there’s always two chairs there because it used to be one and I didn’t like it and so I put two. So I go chat with them and be like you ever seen Pikes Peak? You ever seen people jump out of plane sales people like I know this guy train there? No way. Cool. So it’s one of the cooler more meditative things I get to do because I get just a clear view. Yeah, you guys have a big view about So um yes, thanks for coming on the show. Yeah man, absolutely. Thanks for having me. Absolutely. We got Jose Paw here, the president and founder um of the Colorado co-founder of the Colorado Firefighter Jiu-Jitsu Club. Also a veteran uh United States Marine Corps. I want to bring that up as well because we got first responders, former firefighters, um people who engage for whatever reason in some of the most intense things on earth in an effort to make it a better place. And um Jose, you’re nothing less than that. what I’ve come to know about Jose and I was thinking about this the other day when I was texting you actually man you might be one of the kindest people I’ve ever come across genuinely. Thank you. Yeah man, that means a lot. Yeah. And I uh and so I was so stoked to be a part of this because I feel like I’m just a small piece of of a much bigger picture and so I get to come in and support you guys on your mission. These shirts are super cool. They say um check in on your brothers. They say on the back, mental health matters. And I don’t think we talk about that enough. Uh specifically with what you guys do, and I’ve spent the last 12 years here in Southern Colorado serving first responders, active military service members, their families, veterans, so on and so so forth. And what I’ve learned specifically with men, um people don’t talk about mental health, right? I remember so I was six months into jiu-jitsu. I was over at Prime and I was sitting around. And I was like comfortable enough to just call it what it was. And I was like, “Yo, we’re all here for our mental health. That’s dope.” And people are like, “Oh.” I’m like, “Yeah, it is.” Cuz I guess that’s why we’re here. You wouldn’t be here. And they’re like, “Yeah, it’s kind of cool.” But we got to wrap really cool ass [ ] around it like choking people so that we can sit down and have conversations like we should have all along. And I think your guys’s mission really inspires, fosters, and informs just like a little bit of a different light and a little bit of a different angle and potentially a better conversation. Because what blows me away with first responders, veterans, is that often times there are people with the biggest stories who like rage into the fire. And I was thinking about this on the way over here. There’s like some some people have like terrible days and and and then some people have like the worst days of their lives and you guys are a part of the worst days of people’s lives and that’s like a Wednesday and then they’re like, “High five, we’ll see you at 9:00.” Yeah. Go home to your family. Go get them. You know what? Pretend pretend pretend to be normal at home. God, be chill. And then you’re like, “You’re on sides, so you got to make potatoes.” you know, like like what and then you know and you got to do this thing and I very differently we respond our mission is to save lives but we’re not in the active worst story of everybody’s life and oftentimes within 30 days we get to see the best side of that story. And so I just wanted to bring that up with like clarity and and and and really honor what’s in the room, which is like courage and and you guys showing up here on camera talking about mental health and then in your dayto-day how you show up and provide for the community and your families is uh heroic. Beautiful thing. Yeah, dude. I think what you said um is ironic because I think some people are in jiu-jitsu, right, and they don’t know that they’re there for their own mental health. Like we have recognized or at least I have. I think most of us have like I’m there for a purpose, man. Like get rid of my demons, dude. I come home, like you said, a better person. Um, ready to like be dad, go into dad mode, you know, after school or or whatever, right? Um, and some of those dudes don’t even know that that’s what they’re getting out of that, right? They’re like they go there because they think they like jiu-jitsu, you know, but um they’re not even like aware maybe of the effects that it’s having, right? It’s you got to have an outlet like that. Um, I I’m just lucky to have stumbled upon it, right? Right. And I think that’s kind of the idea for us initially when we started this thing is to introduce some of the dudes in the fire service um who need an outlet um into something that we loved uh jiu-jitsu. That was an outlet for us, right? That was kind of initially how we got this thing started. You know, we and target audience kind of firefighters in general, new andor old, right? It’s definitely easier to bring on new firemen. um who don’t have as big of egos uh into jiu-jitsu, right? But like, man, lately I’ve been trying to get these old guys out, man. Like, hey, dude, it’s okay to start jiu-jitsu at 40 years old. Come look at dude, look at the class, man. There are guys less athletic than you, you know, but you got guys been on the job 20 years and they don’t want to not look the part, you know, not be the toughest guy at the station, right? Like, dude. Anyways, I pay it. Yeah. It’s a hard pill to swallow. For sure. It is. It is a hard pill to swallow. It’s like the American fire service culture because I think it’s very like kind of uh assertive and like it’s getting I think less assertive, but like when I got on the fire department at CSFD in 2013, it was very much like you’re the new guy, you shut up, we yell at you, you do the things, you learn. Yeah. Be seen, not heard. You know what I mean? Go clean the truck. Yeah. Go sweep the floors, right? Yeah. Yeah. Go [ ] Yeah. Exactly. And like you just have to have a good attitude about that sort of thing. But I’ve had people who like were that to me when I was a new guy and then they come do jiu-jitsu with me and it’s like the dynamic changes totally because you’re like you know now that there’s somebody out there that can physically do things to you that you can’t stop and that’s humbling and that doesn’t stop and and and most people don’t even want to look like down that that hallway. You know what I’m saying? They’re like they’re so afraid of what they’re going to find out about themselves when they go go there and there’s a 150 lb dude who will just or female or female who will wreck you who will wreck you, right? And it’s like uh man, I’m you know in the fire service I got this axe. I’m kicking down doors. I’m doing all this stuff. You know, I’m the man, right? But you go to this jiu-jitsu class and these people who don’t look like they they can’t do much, right? And you’re like, “I’ll take them.” And then all the shredded Yeah. they are putting you into a pretzel, all this stuff, you’re just like, “Okay, if you can swallow that pill and, you know, check your ego at the door and be like, “Okay, yeah, this is something I need to get better at.” Because if they can do this to me, how many other people can do this to me, right? and I need to get better and what I my skills and what I do at the fire services is very niche, right? It works here, but it doesn’t translate to this world here, right? So, yeah, dude. I can give you a real time example of how kind of jiu-jitsu helped me, right? Like it wasn’t that long ago that I got into jiu-jitsu. Uh I wrestled for a really long time obviously, but um you know, coming in as a white belt, I stick I lead with my head a lot, right? I stick my head. So, I realized pretty quick like there’s a lot of [ ] I don’t know, dude. Right? And so it’s like having some humility helps in that way, right? Like recogn being able to go like, “Hey, dude. I I don’t know [ ] about [ ] so please treat me like that, right?” Um, and just recently like transferring to this new fire department where I was at the Air Force Academy for 20 years, right? I mean, that place, you know, the ins and outs of how everything operated, right? Now I’m in a new department and I don’t know [ ] right? Somehow they hired me as an officer. So, I’m leaning on these guys who are are firemen who have probably seen officers rotate through where they’re at on these guys to like teach me like I and I’m in the same place. I got to raise my hand and go, “Hey, guys, I don’t know [ ] about [ ] I need you I need your help, man.” You know, and it’s different when you’re in charge and um so you have to like, you know, humility just goes a long way. And I think Juju just uh kind of helped me be a little more humble, you It’s interesting you guys talk a lot about humility and jiu-jitsu and that was my experience as well. Um, when I got sober on the 12step side, you know, this program goes back to 1935 and some people take it or leave it now, but it’s been around a long time and I think there’s a good reason for it. But the whole like emphasis is around like how can you be more humble? How can you lead with more of a servant heart? How can you like make deposits instead of like withdrawals? And jiu-jitsu very quickly um allows you and enables you to do that in a really cool way. And I think it does this thing with our body that’s like real sematic. So if we’re hanging on to a lot of energy and things feel really heavy for whatever reason when you’re done they don’t, you know. And I’m like I was like I can’t believe when I went to I can’t believe people can do this to people and you guys are walking around you’re [ ] accountants and like engineers and I don’t know how vulnerable I am. And and my first thought with jiu-jitsu is like and this was kind of like our our prop like our financial decline is like I’m far more vulnerable physically than anything else and it’s just such a great reminder. And what it does for me not only the humility thing but puts me in the present moment like real quick. Real quick, dude. Or you’re going to Yeah. You can’t not be in the present moment. Yeah. Yeah. You don’t have a choice. You know what I mean? Yeah. To be to do anything. Which is also really interesting because some of the people who portray themselves as being like the most tough right away you can tell by their body language you’re like this is not gonna go well. You know what I mean? Because I know there’s just this weird misconception of people’s capability to use their body to defend themselves. Not only is it a mental thing, but it’s also just like a physical thing like the cardio of it. People get humbled by the cardio. Not even the fact that they’re getting wrapped up by somebody, but the fact that they’re like, I haven’t worked this hard in my whole life. You know what I mean? Yeah. Just see red, right? You just see red, not just red. I love that you say that because I love going into the jiu-jitsu gym and pointing out to my boys like that dude beats the [ ] out of your dad. They’re like, “Really?” I’m like, “Dude, you know, he doesn’t look like it.” But he kills me. He does whatever he wants to me. You’re like that little guy. He’s like, “Dad, are you I’m like, “Yeah, that’s how it works in here, man.” But it’s like anything else. People ask me all the time like, “How do you get into jiu-jitsu?” And I’m like, “Just keep doing.” Like it’s we romanticize fighting in American culture, especially as men and I think just in general historically. But it’s not different than learning how to play the violin. Somebody who does 10,000 hours of the violin is going to be good at the violin. Somebody who does 10,000 hours of doing jiu-jitsu is going to be good at jiu-jitsu. You know what I mean? Yeah. So, and the you start that process, I’m learning. Yeah. Yeah. They’re so But I love what you’re talking about is like people I’ve been trying to get people over at um I was talking to my business partners about yesterday. I’m like, “What do you think the insurance would be if we just I was talking about because he runs the activities department?” I was like, “We just get some mats. We just do Thursday open mat with the guys here.” And he’s like, “Bro, are you kidding me? These guys will be going back to the house practicing the moves. People are going to be do like you’re going to have a lawsuit.” Um but I’m really excited to um integrate it into our adolescent program. It’s going to be kind of the um um I’ve already chatted with um Devin High Totower. Oh, nice. Over at Architect. He does um some youth grappling stuff. It’s a nonprofit. So, we really want to begin to integrate it at a foundational level for boys and girls. Self-defense. Guy’s the right guy for it, man. It’s a stud. You know, it’s tough, too. I’ I’ve talked about um getting Matts like at the fire station like, “Hey, let’s we’ll just go over stuff, right?” And guys, man, the the very I’ve only done like two or three of these sessions, right? And one time it was like, you know, I’m just showing a move. Nothing crazy. And I tell the guys, we’re not we’re not here to spar. This isn’t like what a real jiu-jitsu. I just want to show you guys some moves and you guys can kind of drill them. And you know, and I’m doing a rear naked choke, explaining a rear naked choke and how it goes. And the guy I’m I’m doing it on, he’s like starts to bite my foil. There’s a fireman. There’s a fireman at at the station. He’s a caged animal. And I was like I was like, “Hey, hey, what are you what are you doing, dude?” He’s like, “Well, I mean, I’m just like this wouldn’t work if you did this to me.” I’m like, “Bro, let’s do you realize you?” I’m like, “Bro, I would jam my forearm through your teeth.” Wish your mouth was closed. like this is, you know, but again, it’s that they’re just guys who just can’t let go of that ego, right? And it’s, man, to just sit there and be like, “Okay, this guy’s going to teach me some moose, right?” And and I tell them like, “Man, I’m trying to explain the the uh uh mental health benefits of just being able to, you know, release whether it’s anger, you know, or issues or or just let everything off the board, right? Like I always have you guys ever seen like Searching for Bobby Fischer?” Oh, yeah. There’s that scene, right, where he’s playing chess and his instructor knocks all the pieces off, right? And he’s like, “Okay, move.” Right? It’s like he’s got to remember where the pieces are without the pieces actually physically be there, right? I always think of jiu-jitsu that way where like, man, you come into jiu-jitsu and you have this chessboard full of pieces, right? And but when you start rolling, all those pieces are gone. you have to focus and you have to your your only concern is defending this choke or the arm bar or you know trying to just breathe, right? Um and then once you’re done with that class, once jiu-jitsu is over, then you get to decide what pieces you put back on, right? Because sometimes the board just gets so crowded that it’s hard to like where do I go, right? But when you’re able to clear the board and then be like, “Okay, now I can see things a little more clear, you know.” That’s a great um but it’s it’s so hard to get guys to buy at the fire station. Yeah. I mean really that’s a and out. Yeah. Yeah. That’s really cool. And it’s it’s difficult too and we we insert it a lot of times in our program, but it really is about being seen, valued, and heard in community. I think that’s really like the the center of like human happiness. um and being connected with in addition to being connected with family, community, and culture. And so I think the jiu-jitsu thing tackles a lot of those fronts for a lot of people and whether they have like I know some of you guys have you know stories with family and you know my dad’s no longer here. he died at 62 and because of these adverse things that happened and I think a lot of people that go to these places uh they can really relate to that and then we get to split these like these tough life things 50/50 uh with each other and in community and it’s so nice man because anybody who checks into Peak’s recovery anybody whether it’s substance use or mental health or both um they feel like they’re disconnected not seen valued and heard and feel somewhat discarded, isolated, disconnected and all alone. And so really like we get paid to like authorize the insurance, create medical necessity, you know, treat these acute symptoms of which they do come in with, but ultimately I know in my heart of hearts if I can get them to commit to a year of jiu-jitsu, they’re going to be fine. Yeah. Like we do all this stuff. We got PhDs. We got three, four psychiatric mental health nurse practitioners. I got Dr. Battery B. I got master’s level clinicians all over the place and they’re phenomenal. But I’m telling you, the most important thing is what we’re talking about right now long term because I was 22 and I’d felt like [ ] for a lot of years. I was talking about this with coup a few weeks ago and I didn’t feel like anybody weren’t around and then they were like, you know, I was kind of like, well, you’re going to die from this addiction thing. You’re going to go to prison. I was like, well, I don’t necessarily want to do either of those. and like, “Well, while your friends are going to grad school, you’re going to go to A.” And I’m like, “What? A dude? That’s where old people hang out, you know?” And they ate [ ] donuts and terrible lives. And it was different for me. And and and it changed my life. And so I I know it seems so simple like coming in doing jiu-jitsu, putting the stuff together, creating the nonprofit, but it’s some total impact of a small group of good people doing this [ ] together has this ripple effect in the world that is so astounding and I don’t think you’ll ever be able to measure. Yeah, man. I think that again like that was our initial intent was to get to be able to offer like an outlet for like jiu-jitsu to people who didn’t have it. Um but like now we’re trying to figure out how to get like mental health outlets to people who maybe not even are in the jiu-jitsu community, just firemen in general, right? Like we just lost um another fireman. And there’s a dude from Hayward, California, who just committed suicide. He’s a exJ, buddy of my friend Sean’s. Um, and I know like on the military side, you work a lot with some of these military folks. It’s like suicide prevention, they bring it up a lot in the military, man. We I we don’t really see that on the fire side. There’s not a whole lot of people talking about it necessarily. There are some dudes on the inside talking about it, but the fire service in general hasn’t taken like a stance kind of against it um or like towards it to help like the military has yet. Um and that’s just a product of the fire service, man. Like it just moves like molasses. It’s it’s really slow, you know, like we’re finally talking about um being fit to to fight, right? the IFS IAFF has some new initiatives like hey we should all be healthy firemen you know like dude 10 years [ ] late but you know but and so the same thing like this this like mental health push you know um I feel like we’re on the cusp of of like a bit of a revolution in mental health and hopefully the fire service will um get on board with that man and they have to they have to they have no choice I mean that’s the thing I was thinking about lately is like Here in Colorado Springs, it’s it’s sales tax based. And with how the economy is going right now, people aren’t buying as much stuff as before. So, inevitably, that means that people are doing more with less with shittier equipment, shittier rigs. They’re having to work more overtime. They’re spending more time away from their family. And so, for as long as that’s true, I think that the best thing that people can do is recognize what mental health even means. You know, because mental health doesn’t have to mean going to a psychiatrist. Mental health could be jiu-jitsu. Mental health could be that pickle ball court that’s out here behind this station that we used to play all the time. But the more that the powers that be fail to recognize that we have people who are think about this, if you work through the CO 19 pandemic, that was like a once in a generation event. Yeah. That people had no time to recover from. You just move on to the next thing like we always do. And nobody ever said, “Hey, you know, maybe it was kind of weird that we had to work through that, especially now.” Well, dude, yeah, I was just going to say like, John, I don’t know. Well, your experience was terrible working there. I mean, I worked at station 8, you know, on the bus part of town and and we were ground zero at the um it was an old folks home that had a bunch of people. That was up north, wasn’t it? No, it was down off of um it was off of Shelton. That was crazy. And uh well that was where they staged the first group was up north that they had like 12 I think it was like 12 people die. Don’t quote me on that. But I remember when we would go there we’re like whose turn is it? You know cuz we didn’t know enough about co at the time is what we did. Yeah. You’re like who’s got who’s got kids you know? This is serious. Like that’s how you’re making the decision. There’s nothing that you don’t have a book. Yeah. Like who’s got kids. This [ ] was on the fly. We were like all gowned up like in our [ ] uh birth delivery right kids like going into these SBA. Oh my god. first started, you didn’t know. And so we wore California, we wore gowns and masks and and goggles and for at at one point in time face shields. And that was the determination was who’s got kids? If you don’t have kids, hey, we’ll try to keep you out and then I’ll see you tomorrow. Or no, sorry. If we have if you have kids, you’re going to stay. You’re going to stay out. But you know what I mean? Like people were trying to not take it home from the I think more that we know now, you’re like, h well maybe but you know people were being cautious. In any event, has anybody done a debrief on that to say, “Hey, no, that was actually probably a pretty lifealtering experience to go to work and nobody’s on the road.” You know what I mean? Yeah. But I think the issue with that is that it it became a super political Yeah. thing, right? And so then then it wasn’t really about our mental health. It was about politics and you were either on one side or you were on the other, right? Well, and that could be a mental health piece too because and and honestly the reason you know like the jiu-jitsu why we started this club, right, was because after co the the safe place was the kitchen table, right? Where you could vent and you could talk about anything with anybody, right? But COVID was so divisive. Yeah. and guys who you had broke bread with, who knew you had a family, who knew all this stuff. And if you were provax or antiax, whatever side you were on, there were dudes that you, like I said, you broke bread with who were like, “Hey, I don’t I know that you have a family and you we have the same job and we went through the academy together, but if you don’t get the vax, well then if you get fired, cool. Good for them for firing you, right?” And so the the family aspect that that was super tight at the fire station kind of went away and people stopped talking to each other and it became and so I saw that. Yeah, it was it was terrible, right? And it still lingers on because there hasn’t been like you were saying nobody’s done a debrief for all this stuff. Well, and I was thinking about Okay, so when I was working here at the tail end of CO, if you got vaccinated, you could sit at the kitchen table and eat. If you were unvaccinated, you had to go to your individual bedroom and eat your meal. Yeah. I’m like, how does that make you feel? Like six. When have you guys ever heard of the book Tribe by Sebastian Junger? We’ve had him on the show. Oh, have you? Okay, cool. So, you know, one of the last core tribes, one of the last tribes, such a good book. In modern society is the fire service because you have people who have one common goal and we live together, we eat together, we do everything together, right? What better way to break up a tribe than to say, “Hey, um, you you are going to go eat by yourself. We’re going to eat at a table.” You know what I mean? And nobody has taken the time to address that. And I’m like, I wonder what the repercussion of that truly was. How can you remain a cohesive team when, let’s say, onethird or 1/4 of your team is over here. It was getting to the point where guys were trying to fist fight each other over their own beliefs in the station. And I’m like, what is happening right now? you know, and honestly, like even though you know, we’re so many years removed from this, right? Like there are still, you still know who said the things that they said. Don’t forget that, right? And so, as much as you know, I can work with dudes, all this stuff, but in the back of my mind, you still know what dudes were saying about other dudes and it’s like, man, it chief that was trying to fire the people, you know, like you know, right? Well, and people are afraid to hurt feelings, but I’m like, maybe we need to hurt some feelings. Maybe we need to sit around and say, “Hey, you really pissed me off when you said that to me, and I’m a person, and so are you, and we’re supposed to be on the same team, right? But we don’t do that.” You know, it’s like this the society of the fire service is we’re the problem solvers. So, we just move from one thing to another. And I think I’m the only one right now who’s removed from the fire service, right? And I’ve spent enough time removed now that I realize like, okay, now that I’ve removed myself from that situation, here are some things that I reflect back on and I’m like, that really divided us and we didn’t address it in a way that probably was the best way to do it. And there are some generational things that are still holding on in the fire service that will hinder it moving forward if we don’t address them. Because the days of, hey, just stuff it down and move on, I’m telling you, your nervous system can’t handle it. It’s not a matter of how tough you are. It’s a matter of we have I I read something the other day that we have like 12,000 times more information on a daily basis now than people did a couple hundred years ago because of what we have in our pocket. It’s the slot machine in our pocket. So if we can’t recognize that we’re being flooded with information and try to actually partition out our day so that we are mentally healthy, the fire service is going to continue to do this. Well, the the reality is, right, like when we talk about who are the worst students, it’s teachers, right? Who are the worst at asking for help, it’s the dudes that that go and help all the time, right? And so, um I know like my my instructor is really good at um I can come in, you know, and I’ve had some issues or I’ve had some and I’ll come in, he going, “Hey, what’s going on, Mike?” And then he’ll be like, “Hey, is everything all right? He can tell as soon as I walk in, right? Or when we’re rolling or something is going on. Yeah. Right. He sees me so often and he knows my attitude and you know and I’m I I felt like I was pretty good at that too. But recently he’s been like, “Hey man, what what’s going on with you know, what’s his face?” I’m like, “I think he’s good, man.” And then a week later I find out, “Oh man, dude, he was he’s going through a divorce. She’s going, I don’t roll enough with him to be able to to pick that out, you know, but my instructor, he sees these guys all the time and he can he can tell when something is off and he, hey, dude, are you all right? What’s going on, man? You want to talk? You want, you know, at the end of the day, he knows that jiu-jitsu is going to at bare minimum help you out with whatever you’re going through. It’s going to help you out, right? He he may not be the best counselor, the best all this stuff, right? But jiu-jitsu does that, right? And so if he’s able to pinpoint like he’s going through a rough time, right? Let me, you know, kind of move this class along to kind of help him, you know, or get some roles in with him. Maybe it’ll spark conversation, right? But we as as firefighters, we are terrible at asking for help, right? And like you were saying, the military has gotten to a point where I mean, what 22 a day, right? That’s what that’s what the the motto is. We’re the the uh veterans we’re losing 22 a day, right? I mean, it’s thrown out there. They do all these things, right? To get the word out there of how many people they’re losing. Our stats, I feel, are super skewed because when someone does commit suicide, no one says anything. No one says, “Hey, that guy killed himself. That guy took his life.” It’s like, “Oh, he died.” No one wants to to they they feel like, you know, it’s um private. You don’t want to give out too much information. Just throw this across the badge and Exactly. you get buried, you know. Well, and some people will go as far as saying like they’re a coward. You know, like some people will deliberately swing the other way where you’re like, well, man, if you felt bad for that person and you were trying to be empathetic, this person over here saying this is instantly going to shut you down, you know? So, that’s another thing that I’m like improving that dialogue would be helpful. and changing the stigma of what we go through, right? Because like you were saying earlier, we we see things that most ordinary people are not going to see on a daily basis and like you said, that’s just a regular Wednesday to us, right? Um and it’s a constant thing that we see. Um and at the end of the day, we know what we signed up for, right? I think it takes a a certain individual to do the job that we do right for an extended period of time because if you know my sister or my brother if they saw what what I I saw on a daily basis it might only be a couple months a year and they’re like I’m out. I can’t handle this. Right? It it takes a certain character, a certain just uh mindset to go through these, you know, how many times can someone give you a limp baby, you know? How many times can you see, you know, body parts and all this stuff repeated over and over and over before you’re like, okay, I know this is what I signed up for, but this everything that I keep putting in this chest and being able to, you know, lock up and go eat dinner and crack jokes, at some point this thing’s going to, you know, crack. And when it cracks, then you’re trying to figure out, well, how do I do I seal this thing back up? You know, do I get this thing out of here? What do I how do I process this thing? Right? And jiu-jitsu is, you know, when we started the club, it was it’s a gateway. It’s a gateway to conversation to be able to kind of break these things down after a hard roll, you know, and you notice guys going through stuff, right? we’re able to have these conversations, but at the end of the day, we’re not professionals, you know, like we were saying earlier, we’re just dumb firemen who can do jiu-jitsu, right? Um, and that’s why the shift now for the jiu-jitsu club, you know, we got our we finally got our uh nonprofit status. Um, and we are we want to be able to um raise money to be able to actually get people professional help, get our guys professional help when they need it. Right. And I I I went through something this summer. Um I’m not going to get too in into details, but um we had to go to Boston and uh we we went over there and we didn’t know how long we were going to be there, right? It was a medical emergency. We knew we had to be there in a week and we didn’t know how long we were going to be there. And uh I reached out to my buddy who’s a fireman at Boston Fire. I reached out to to a couple people at my department. Um there was like a lot of questions being asked and I didn’t really have any answers to the questions. And then I re just reached out to my buddy in Boston. I said, “Hey dude, it looks like we’re going to Boston. I don’t know if you know anybody with a Airbnb or anybody or if you guys have hotel hookups.” Um, but uh I don’t know how long we’re going to be there. I’m all everything is like 400 bucks a night. We reached out to the hospital. The hospital’s like, “Yeah, we have connections with with these hotels.” We reached out to those hotels and that stuff there. There was no availability with the connections that the hospital had and uh so reached out to my buddy and he said, I mean pretty much said less, you know. He said, “Let me see what I could do.” Two hours later, I get a call from uh Boston Fire Cancer Association and uh the guy’s like, “Hey, we got you covered. We booked you a room across from the hospital for as long as you need to stay.” Man, I’ll tell you what, like going through that experience really like I came back reinvigorated on like this mission because when I needed something, it wasn’t someone who said, “Hey, call this foundation. Call this association.” You already have so much on your plate, right? to to try to Okay, on top of all that, okay, let me call an organization that I’m not even associated with, that I’ve never donated to. They don’t know who I am. They don’t Yeah. Right. But my buddy made a phone call and they called me and they said, “We got you. Don’t worry about a thing.” Right. And that’s what I want us to be able to do. Right? That is the new focus and the mission is that when someone comes to us, right? Obviously, you know, we can do what we can in jiu-jitsu, right? But when someone comes to us with suicidal ideations, marriage problems, addictions, you know, just something overwhelming where they they finally get to the point where they reach out for help or they might not even reach out for help. We see it in them because we do jiu-jitsu with them. and we’re like, “Hey, is everything all right?” And they break down. You realize, “Man, this guy is struggling. This guy is in need. I don’t want to have to point to an organization, say, “Call this person. Hey, call.” I want to be able to say, “G give me a second.” And I make the phone call and I have to go pick the guy up and drive them somewhere and, you know, take them there to get them the help, right? Because that’s that’s how it was for me. And it was incredible. It wasn’t a, you know, again, it already takes so much for us to ask for help and then when they go, okay, go now go ask that guy. It’s tough, right? If you do it once and people are like, okay, let me help this guy. And you take them, you get them to help. That’s the vision, you know, and the goal of this uh jiu-jitsu club. So, and it’s absolutely synonymous, I think, with any beautifully led recovery process is is helping people to help ourselves. It really feels good to be able to provide that resource. When you were talking, I was thinking that you guys are just trained to assess like really big acute emergent trauma intense [ ] like we call like in our industry like big tea stuff boop. But the phone call like with the guy in Boston that was assessed differently and that’s what’s being messed is that everybody’s like everybody’s [ __ ] nobody broke your neck. Everybody’s got a foot, right? All your fingers. Yeah. Every fine ball, you know, whatever. And and I think what we’re the call to action and what I think you spoke so clearly to Jose is like let’s take a moment to like get into those moments with each other and talk about what’s really going on because then it has an opportunity to be somewhat impactful in somebody’s life. And that’s all it was in AA for me. And people is like, “Yo, I’ll never forget some of the simple things people did for me.” Yeah. Said, “Hey, it was your birthday, man. You said you like chocolate cupcake.” I’m like, “Do you want?” He’s like, “Yeah, I know. You like work at a gas station.” You get a serious sweets.
But that’s cuz he cookies. Yeah. Yeah. And Tyler’s right, man. I’ve been on this thing lately where I told Cass said, “I can’t eat sweets at all.” And she’s like, “Why can’t you just like have some on the weekends?” Like, I tried. I have to eat them all. I had to eat that. I’m the same way. I’m an abstainer. Imagine what you’re drinking was like, “Go, bro. Sure to daddy.” Yeah. I’m the same way. I think he puts donuts in front of me. I could eat six 12 in a sitting like they’re just Oh, bro. I can’t even start seven pounds, dude. To get to I know. I know. Costa Rica, bro. But now I’m on like, you know, dude, you know what’s a trip is I like just recently, I’m not going to get into details, but like I almost missed an opportunity. Um, and it was like right in front of me, man. U we talk a lot about it. We just literally had like suicide prevention training at my work, right? And my buddies like venting to me and like laying some heavy [ ] on me. And uh we were talking about like getting some some like long longer term like down the pipeline help, you know, and uh and he was dropping some heavier stuff on me. He was like almost in tears, you know, and I was just kind of going about my business. This guy’s like a really normal dude. He’s like super successful, all the things that he does. And so you just never think that that guy needed help, right? And so and I kind of like look at him and he’s almost in tears while he’s laying this [ ] on me, you know? And I almost just kind of like was like, “Yeah, dude. That’s sucks, man.” You know, yeah, we all go through it, whatever. And I I was like, “God, man, we literally just talked about this.” I just And at that moment, I was like pressed kind of the SOS button and and reached out to some folks to to get him some help. But it was like like the snake that almost bit me that was right in front of me. You know what I mean? I almost missed an opportunity to help this dude out. And we talk about it all the time. It’s easier to do that, right? Yeah. Just going about my business, man. I had a 30 sh my brain. Yep. Absolutely. Is that part of your job? Um, like you said, nobody’s bleeding, right? Nobody was Right. So, uh, but it was nice to have some resources available. I reached out to a couple of friends in the mental health uh, industry and and that’s kind of our goal, right? Is to be able to press the SOS button for somebody and you’re not getting fire trucks, right? at the beginning like mental health resources. So in in the same token, be able to provide some some aid, some mental first aid, if you will, and to remove a barrier. It’s kind of like we were talking about the other day is like we have a peer support program on CSFP. I’m sure a lot of departments do. Yeah. How do that get used though? Well, I know they use it, but I guess my thing is this. First of all, you get a list of people who you would consider to be safe to talk to. And you could look at that list and like, man, I would never call that person. Why is this person a peer supporter? You know what I mean? That person’s But also, it’s still an extension of your department. So, I think what’s good about our organization is we are not attached to a department. Yeah. So, if a guy here locally or a girl here locally calls and says, “I’m having a problem.” It’s not like they’re calling up their employer and saying, “I have a problem.” Because there still is the stigma of if you got a mental health issue, you are a liability to the fire department. That’s like an old thought process, right? And sometimes that may be true and people need to get help and then they move on and they’re good again, right? But I think removing the barrier and then also not being tied to something like EAP where even if it truly is private and confidential, there’s always still this like underlying hesitation that somehow it’s tied to the department. So to have a nonprofit that is completely separate, I think will open up a lot more doors for people to talk about some of their issues. I agree 100%. The EAP is an interesting thing, how that works and who they refer to and all that good stuff, which is interesting to me sometimes. But we get like organic referrals from EAP. We do really well by um a lot of those folks. And um but I think access is cool and that’s something I kind of wanted to talk about a little bit and I was talking with you guys about it yesterday when we met was for starters, I think what we can do is give out our admissions number. You know, Aaron Granny and the team of just badasses. I think we have four or five now. um would be happy to take the call as we are happy to take Medicaid callers who certainly can’t come to us but we’re going to find the next best place for you. Y and so I think it’d be a really quality add-on because right away we can treat treat the acute symptomology for most first responders. What’s great about first responders is oftentimes they have good insurance. Some of them don’t even know how to access the benefits that they have, but oftentimes they’re very good benefits. Not only do they have access to counseling and outpatient services, but FMLA and if you wanted to and I’m not trying to like strip fire departments away, but if you have acute mental health issues, like we’ve done the costbenefit analysis, a mentally healthy employee is the best employee, right? And it’s best it’s better for community. It’s less ER visits, less detoxes, less residential treatments, less ER visits, less detoxes, less family stuff. And so I think if we just come at it from that angle and just see humans where they’re at, they can call into our program. we’re not connected with EAP, then get a reasonable human on the if I was going to spend some time with them, you know, and and put them in the next best spot, whatever that is. And then as we get get those acute symptoms out of the way, god forbid there are some, then we get people on mats, we get people in these jiu-jitsu things and and it creates this beautiful path, I think, to recovery and community that um I think is unparallel. Post-traumatic growth. Yeah. Am I right? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, man. Post-traumatic growth. It’s got to got to be. Yeah. I always think of my buddy Drew. Like I went um I talked about him on the podcast, but he was my best friend growing up. Second grade I met him and he was always just like a little bit better than me at every sport. And I’ll never forget in third grade and he likes to fight. Not not like I do anymore, right? Like just like, you know, he’s a fighter. He’s tough guy, you know? And remember one time in third grade I I was like, “Hey, he was sitting in my girlfriend’s seat and I was serious about girlfriend thing for a grade.” I was like I was all [ ] up. I was a surprise. You know what I mean? And like and so I like I grab him out of my seat and he punches me like three times in the face. I’m like the teacher grabs him and grabs me and then sends me to the office cuz I’m like Chris Burns and I got it like that. Anyway, so he becomes my best friend, man. I’d be on intensive probation, seventh and eighth grade. My surve he’d come over eat pizza with me and u my surveillance officer come over hide him in the closet. I mean, dude, he’s like the best football player in school desk. Like all the things you would never ask this kid like you all right? seems to me like pantry full of food, parents that care about him, all these got it all going on. Got it all going on, man. He’s a firefighter and he’s a the the biggest fire station in Tucson, Tucson Fire Department. All this [ ] we got to do. Becomes a medic. And then I don’t talk to him for a while. And the first time I see him, boom, his wife’s facetiming me and he just had open heart surgery. Damn. Just had a heart attack. He was 30 38 years old. Like one of the You’re like, whoa, too young. He’s on the hospital bed, right? And it’s all about what we just got done talking about. It’s intensity on intensity on intensity. And there’s no pressure release. And sometimes these guys, you know, we look at like suicide, but what about like all cause death mortality associated with the underpinnings of intensity, chronic stress, nervous, just the middle of the night wakeups, right? Like the cortisol that’s getting dumped in your system that’s not getting released. There’s a lot of studies on that kind of stuff. I think you’re talking about just overall health effects of working in the fire service, right? Like I for whatever reason, dude, I don’t when I run calls, I have the ability to kind of turn the switch on and I know it’s like just a job, right? And that’s not really the trauma necessarily that affects me. It’s the like I come back to the station and I can’t get back to sleep or I’ve only got two hours of sleep that night and then I go home and I’m trying to deal with my kids who who are expecting like normal dad, you know, hey man, we could press this this hard with dad and he he you know he gives but if I don’t go home with that same level of give like that affects my family, you know, right? Like and then that just compounds, right? the stress that’s now maybe I’m arguing with my wife about whatever because I’m in a [ ] mood, right? Or whatever, man. There’s a bunch of these Yeah, dude. There’s there’s all of these like downstream effects of working in the fire service that for the longest time we just kind of like, you know, um just like cleaning muckers, like if you had the we just didn’t talk about it. Um because we had this tough guy mentality, right? Like the dirtiest hom in the stage and that’s the [ ] that’s the saltiest guy, you know, biggest mustache, right? Like real tough guy mentality kind of stuff. But um now there are just groups of us talking about this [ ] and it just needs to kind of get out to more people, man. Like, “Hey, dude, just because you handle this stress well, doesn’t mean you’re handling all the stress well.” And I think that’s like jiu-jitsu is a great outlet for me. My wife will tell me like, “Hey, you’re being a dick, you know? You need to go [ ] work out. Go to jiu-jitsu. Come back a better person.” Yeah. And it works. It works for me. I’m like, “Fuck.” I have that I go back a reset button. I’m a better dad. I have patience, right? like pretty mellow it out, you know. You know, think about how that spreads too when you guys are able to because it’s it’s one in a 100, one in a thousand. Like Drew’s doing well now. He’s lost 40 pounds. Everybody in the fire station’s like, “Hey, how you doing?” You can get sit over here eating this banana all healthy and [ ] and he’s like, “Well, I started doing these things and started putting myself first.” And I have this quote that I kind of live by and it’s like, “I’m going to put myself first so that I can go out and put others.” Not so, but I come first. And it’s non-negotiable. my wife like the first, you know, 10 years of it, she was like, “It’s a little intense.” But like I I flowed. Yeah. You know, and I want to show up and and and I I want to be the best version of myself and let me know if I got to turn that lower into the morning, you know? Yeah. Yeah. But somewhere in the day, you need to get your time for you. And I’m the same like you I think you’re very similar to me, man. I will get up and go do it at 6:00 a.m. so that it doesn’t affect my kids things so I can still be dad, right? But at some point in the day, he has something for me. You know what I mean? So that I come first so that I can put them. It’s interesting you guys are saying this, too, cuz first responders like they don’t they’re generally not selfish in that regard. And when I got into AA, they were like, you get one year, 365 days, you’d be selfish. Selfish as selfish can be. Soak it all up. You’re like, boy, that’s the first time I’ve ever heard that in my whole life. This is great. And then after that one year, be a steward of that selfishness and that foundation and what you what it took to get there and go give to others freely what you’ve learned and that selfishness. And so I sit down, the first thing I’ll ever ask first responders that come in, they’re in there and they’re sort of same question, same answer every time. I say, “This probably the first time you ever done something like this for yourself.” And they just like you probably never done anything for yourself. You always take care of everything. You’re the guy. You’re the boat. You’re the house. You’re the motor home. You’re the foundation. And you don’t ask for anything. I got a guy in my program. It gives me chills, man. I got a guy in my program right now, uh, he’s an attorney, 40 years, has a practice, you know, somewhere in the United States here, and I sat with him said the same thing. He’s because he’s because it’s like your world view is snapped because all of you guys are so tough and you do the thing and and then really successful, and then people that are really successful in business, it’s the same kind of thing. It’s like you get into these places and you’re like, “How did I end up here?” You know? It’s like this feels like the walls are all closing on all the sides only to find out that like you deserved an authentic shot at putting yourself first. And now we get to do that for 30 days. And it’s a really beautiful thing that I get to do because sometimes people are like, “Oh my gosh, your job is so hard.” I’m like, I swear to you, worst day of someone’s life, day one. And often times by 30 days, it’s the top five best experiences of their entire life. Yeah. And I think that’s what we’re kind of aiming to do here with the jiu-jitsu club is these meaningful moments that matter like matter the most. And oftentimes for me they matter on the mat. And I just love getting beat up. Like and I’m okay with it because it just does so much for me. You know, I’m not okay with being beat up, but I’m okay with Yeah, he could be. You’re too good. You’re too good, man. No, I get you up. But it’s like the conversations like you were saying, Jose, it’s it’s oftentimes not even the jiu-jitsu. The gist is great because you physically like exert yourself and there’s something to that, but it’s als it’s often times like the 30 minutes after live rolls where you’re just like, you know, that’s when you’re getting kind of you’re able to almost like release a little bit more of yourself and and give yourself get to people a little more like, hey, man, if they’ve got something going on, you you’re pretty mellowed out and you’re you’re a better listener after after you kick an ass. Yeah. Yes. The gardeners put the ego’s been released. Absolutely that. barriers that you know everyone is always like protecting themselves you know and then you know they don’t want to let too much out but you go to jiu-jitsu you know it’s like not only you getting choked you’re get you know we were talking about feet earlier right touching on your on your foot just sweating in your mouth like what happens it’s like okay you can pretty much talk it’s funny about the the the vulnerability that’s created through this decomposing of the ego cuz now we know who and what everything is and like the guy who walked in with like this maybe he’s not that right and so I know we know we all know and so it dumps that and part of like early recovery part what we used to do at peaks it’s crazy you guys are talking about this we do a lot in AA back in the day too we sit down and share stories well because like it’s [ ] like what you’re showing me it really is vulnerable like who are you and so the new guys would come in and they’d be like bro like yeah and if I’m a guy like yeah I experienced some sexual trauma I was 13 years and they’ve been for three months and the new the new guy’s like, “Well, [ ] man.” I’m like, “Yeah, I’m not.” Well, yeah, I am tough and all that, but also too, like I’ve been hurt and and I’ve had these tough stories and and I’ve been a part of some really tragic and intense situations and and then all of a sudden now we’re having a real conversation and now we’re doing that thing we’re talking about earlier like splitting it 50/50 because we can’t do it until we go there. It’s similar to like what I’ve noticed with like hiking or backpacking or running or mountaineering or elk hunting, some of these things. It’s like, well, yeah, it’s cool to like get an elk and get meat in your fridge. Sure. But like literally, we’re putting steps in, sunlight, friend, camp, connection, decomposing to the ego, hard [ ] Same thing with running. I was running by these elk hunters. I was done this like 12 mile runway out the middle of nowhere. I’m like, dude, these guys got 70 pound packs on. And I was like, same, same. But I don’t got that pack on, you know. But we’re all I think we’re all aiming to do the same thing, which just break something down through doing something that’s hard for everybody and then letting the chips fall where they might and then like having just great conversations. Yeah. Yeah. You used to be able to do that [ ] like we were talking about around the the kitchen table, man. Um and I think the fire service is morphing a little bit, you know? Um maybe just a little more like professional, I guess, if you will. But um we’re a little more sensitive in general on the fire service side, right? Like uh race, sex, all the things that you used to kind of just be able to like take lightly, make jokes about, now people are like getting fired for. And so people are like, “Hey man, I don’t know if I’m going to talk about that that [ ] right?” Um and so to have like an outlet like jiu-jitsu or whatever where you can kind of um joke and smoke and and or whatever um with less impact on your career, which is what we were all talking about, having a resource outside of the fire service that’s still fire service related. um is huge. And it’s interesting how in jiu-jitsu, right, left, center, [ ] midfield, doesn’t matter. Everybody’s kicking. Yeah. And nobody’s like, “Oh, you stupid.” And people will it differently than in community. What you’re bringing up right now, like these very intense issues in community, we kind of like, “Hey, man, but I love that guy’s my [ ] guy.” You can have different Isn’t that what being a person is? Like that’s what’s so frustrating to me about modern society. That’s why I’m like happy we have something that’s like the last layer of just being able to have some real conversations is everybody’s afraid of hurting everybody’s feelings and everybody is like disconnected from community, you know? So like we used to be able to just be, yeah, I think differently than you and let’s have a conversation about it and maybe we don’t arrive at the same thought, but that’s okay. Let’s keep being friends. You know, the I think the internet has kind of changed that for a lot of people. It’s like you’re either this way or you’re that way and that’s all that exists online, which that’s not how it is in the real world. And like the more that you spend time in group settings like this where people do have differences of opinions, the more you’re like I kind of like to hear other people’s thoughts. Yeah, that’s cool. You know, and why they got them. Yeah. I’ve been so blessed all these years. They serving people at peaks for 12 years, been in the recovery field almost two decades, people from all over the world. And my same question is always like, well, what do you believe in? How’d you get there? Yeah. And I get to sit with them and I’m like and as long as I have like an open heart and an open mind, they’ll tell me everything. And it’s interesting to me that as I have these conversations with people throughout my career, it’s it’s always like I always feel like single different path. Single different path. Single different path. Single different path. Everybody wants to feel good. I they posted a short of me doing this the other day, but everybody wants to feel good. Everybody wants to be connected with family and community and culture. They want to feel like they have value, you know, and um we want to be good fathers and husbands and friends and colleagues and peers and and I think everybody wants that. Absolutely. You know, and so uh but some people we just have, you know, wildly different paths and I think honoring those is part of this ego thing we’re talking about and part of the jiu-jitsu culture and part of what we’re trying to foster and what you guys are trying to foster here at Colorado Fire Fighter Jiu-Jitsu. You know, I was coming over here. I’m such an idiot. Like I’m not like an English major or anything like that at all. Some people look at me like you got lucky. Like I was coming over here and I was looking at the hat. Swear to go and I almost said it to my wife but she’s like really well read and like she’s like yeah and I was like it should be two Fs and I was like huh is a compound word. I was like I was dropping my camper van off at uh in Littleton and I was driving up and I was like I think Jose got the hat wrong. But u I’m kind of worried. Let’s compound house compound. Learn that much. Got that nailed down. Um so let’s talk about Man, it’s just been a really good conversation, guys. It’s been really nice and connected and a breath of fresh air. I wear this aura ring and when I have really good podcasts, swear guy, I go from stress, which is like what I run at, and just poof just dumps down because it’s all about like community and connection. And I think we’re able to do that pretty well today. So I appreciate that. also online resources. How do we get a hold of us? What do we do? How do we do it? Let us know. Yeah. So, on Instagram_cfjc
um I am working on the website. We’re going to our goal is to be up and running um by January 1st, 2027. So, we have a lot of still we have a lot of work to do before we get there, right? We need to get a branded canopy and all this stuff, right? It just takes money to be able to when we show up at events, right? whether it’s, you know, a firefighter event or a grappling event or a mental health event, right? Uh like conferences, uh so that we look professional, right? We already have our 501c3 status. Um and so the website’s going to be www. uh cfjdc.org. Um so that should be up again by the first of the year. We’ll have dates on uh the next open mat and resources for mental health and how to get a hold of us. If you want to partner with us, if you think we’re a fit for you or this is the community you want to serve, please reach out to us and, you know, we’ll um we’ll see how we can kind of vet, you know, whether it’s therapist or um any mental health professional that wants to participate. Uh any jiu-jitsu gym that wants to host us for uh an open mat, um they can reach out also. And honestly, the the goal would be that um we’re not the only ones here in the Springs running an open map, right? Um eventually, if we could have, you know, a guy in Denver or a guy, you know, Golden U is like, “Hey, you know what? I I like your guys’ mission. I’m a firefighter. I want to host, you know, open mats also.” Then we have, you know, CFJC, you know, Golden Branch. Yeah. You know, um or chapter, whatever, you know, and then they put the dates that or they give us the dates that they’re going to have an open mat. And that portion where it says, you know, check out the next open mat. You’ll have one in Golden, one in Denver, one in Loveland, one, you know, and it’s not just you guys come here or we are physically having to go all the way, you know, up and down the front range, you know. So the goal is obviously to expand and and it’s it’s not the Colorado Springs Firefighter Jiu-Jitsu Club, right? It’s the Colorado Firefighter Jujitsu Club. So if we could take care of all of Colorado and get this movement, you know, and get all this help um and resources and funding, you know, to be able to provide the help, um that’s the goal. So um Instagram, uh the website, and then uh to contact us, it’ll be info@ uh cfjc uh.org, I believe. And then as far as donations go, I I’ve always been really shy about asking for money, but I feel like this is a a really good cause. And one of the things that’s going to cost money is a future program that Jose came up with, which is called the Trainer Jake program. For reference, it costs about $150 to $200 a month depending on the gym that you go to in Colorado to pay for jiu-jitsu. And our goal eventually is to sponsor people much like a program called Adopt a Cop does where we could actually cover people’s tuition for a year to try to get them immersed in the jiu-jitsu culture. Obviously, that’s something that the three of us probably are not or four of us are not going to be able to pull out of our own pocket. You know what I mean? That’s pretty expensive. So, that’s the thing that I would hope that we start getting some donations for so that we can start sponsoring people statewide who have an interest in jiu-jitsu that maybe don’t have the money because that’s another thing that I don’t think people are realizing is like people getting out of the academy here in CSFD are still struggling to probably afford to live when they’re first like a fourth class because housing price prices are crazy right now. So, maybe they can’t afford the $150 a month despite the fact that they do have a government salary. So, it would be nice to get some of those donations rolling in so that we can get people the ability to start training at different places. Mhm. I love that you mentioned that, too, cuz I was thinking, you know, you go through get your acute symptoms stuff taken care of somewhere and then get a year membership jiu-jitsu. That that that will change the course of your life. Totally. If you committed to that one year, Yeah. you’ll have a different life when you’re done. And then you can do what everybody else does. You get your blue belt and you quit. Yep. Exactly. No, I still got mine. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, man. You got to be short timing though, right? I I’m hoping to go to Worlds next year. Yeah. Yeah. And still in blue. Okay. Yeah, because I’ve only had it in um December will be two years. Okay. Okay. Three years. March will be four years in jiu-jitsu. So, it’s not a lot. Okay. So, I absolutely love it. In the meantime, um for folks that are reaching out, first responders want to get in touch with you guys. I think for for now, especially if you have issues, mental health issues are coming up. Whether you think they’re intense or not, compared to the average person, call in, get a test for it. Our admissions department uh will treat you like an individual, give you an opportunity to explore potential resources in the community. In addition to if you have, you know, acute symptoms of mental health issues or substance use disorder issues, there’s nowhere in in the state of Colorado um that will treat you with more decency uh than Peaks Recovery. Our mission is to save lives. We walk with individuals in a really special way. So much so that uh we were published um in Newsweek again as a number one addiction treatment program in all of Colorado. And it’s been multiple times we have been published that way. And on that list, I’m going to just brag. Subtle flex, bro. Huge flex. This is on that list. There’s only there’s only four of us, 40% of them that aren’t owned by a private equity company or a company that’s traded on the Dow Jones. Nice work, bro. Good [ __ ] Very cool, man. And so that’s why we’re going to show up for the people that show up for us in the community. They’re really really valuable to hear us here at Peaks. And uh regardless of that call, we’ll get you connected with the jiu-jitsu guys here. Make sure you got a plan and a purpose. So appreciate you guys coming on. And on on the Instagram also uh the donation box because the donation process that’s hooked up to the website and our bank account, all that stuff. Uh is uh through give Butter, which is like a nonprofit organization that kind of sets up all that stuff. So the cure if you go to Instagram there’ll be in the bio you can click on that and then you can donate if you feel like you want to donate. Seg lastly since uh they’re going to be coming out as well at least for one day at the winter symposium largest addiction behavioral health conference here in Colorado that’s in uh la January 31st this starts. So, we’ll have you guys out there introducing you to the community, talking about donations, talking about how we can connect with some treatment programs, young adult, adolescent, or otherwise, and how we can just grow this thing up and down the front range. Looking forward to it, man. Yeah. So, all right, my beautiful people. Thank you so much for joining us, guys. Thanks for having us. Absolutely. Until next time. Peace.